All That I Am: 2.0

Hello all!  I’m B A C K!!!

Back, you say?  Back from where?  Who even are you?

It’s kind of a weird statement, right? With the launch of my website, you’d think I was “new” to the world and ideally, I should be introducing myself accordingly.

Except…

This is not my first foray into the blogosphere…in fact, this ain’t even my first rodeo. 

It definitely ain’t my first blog post.

Except that for many of you, it is. This is the first time you’re meeting me, as it were,  and as excited as I am to introduce myself to you, I gotta stress: I’ve been here before.

I started this website years ago when I published my first book.  It was a book of short stories of horror, and in an attempt to get some traction going for that book (and my writing), I started this blog.  Right here on this very site.

And I wrote, and I wrote, and I wrote—I mean, it felt like a lot of writing, given that I worked a full-time job (sometimes I worked two jobs), was married, and had three young children at the time.  It was a lot, but I poured my heart into it anyway…but alas, I never got the impression that it took off the way I imagined it would.  Certainly, my first book did not do well at all…and if this blog was to be a venue for success, I didn’t see it.  And in the meantime, I still had to work and live my everyday life: away from the blogosphere, away from my dreams. 

So slowly but surely, somewhat defeated, I stepped away. 

I put that first book on a shelf somewhere not easily visible (so I couldn’t be reminded that it was a dud), stopped posting to my blog, and eventually, it was like none of it ever happened.  Went back to my daily life: worked, got divorced, raised my kids. Thoughts of being a writer hit the back burner and went up in smoke…

Except…

My pen wouldn’t always leave me alone, my imagination still stirred, and despite it all, sometimes, I still wrote.

I switched from writing stories to writing poetry because (and here’s an interesting tidbit about me), I’m both lazy AND impatient (probably not the best character traits for a writer) and poetry was a quick way to write a narrative fast without a whole lot of effort.

But here’s the thing (oh, “here’s the thing”! That’s a little nod to a dear friend of mine—you know who you are).  Without realizing it, I had something to say, and poetry captured all that I wanted to express–and then some.  It became an outlet; maybe not every day (sometimes weeks or months or even years would go by between poems) but when I was struck with the desire to be creative, I would scribble a verse or two.  And over time—twelve years or so—I discovered I had a publishable body of work that would become Five Dreams.

Go figure.

Which brings us back to the present and this (re)introduction.

Funny how things go, ain’t it?  To get this book off the ground and market it properly (I’ve learned a few things since my last stint in self-publishing) I find myself back here, to my old original blog and interestingly enough–surprisingly enough–it feels like returning to something familiar. Like revisiting an old friend I haven’t seen in ages.

Like coming home

And just like any reunion, I found things here in my original blog that moved me and touched my spirit: my first posts. Looking back on them, I remember how unsure I was when I started, how nervous I was to be open and out in the world with my writings and my random thoughts.

I don’t even know why I felt that way—I had like what? Twelve followers??? HA!

Yeah, that makes me laugh.  But aging and wisdom are a beautiful thing, and I love being here again, with less concern and more freedom to just be me and enjoy this ride, wherever it takes me.  It’s not every day you get a second chance to do something you love and enjoy, so I’m going to coast on this wave and just do my thing.

Right now, my thing is to introduce myself to you.

And it occurred to me that the best way to do it is with a throwback post—one that did a heck of a job of presenting myself to the world, even if I didn’t think it did at the time. But I feel the strength of those words now, and I embrace them.

Because hey, I’m back—and I’m better than ever.  If I do say so myself. 

So check out my original post written way back when. It’s an oldie but a goodie, and I think it’ll tell you everything you need to know about me.

And welcome (back) to my website.  I’m glad to get to know you.

EM

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